dieting secrets of the rich and fabulous

WARNING : GROSS STUFF BELOW

i've always said that the best way to lose weight is to get sick.

after my 2 week cold/sinus infection, it seems i've shed between 5 and 8 pounds. yeah, that's probably all muscle, but my bench press is still about where it ought to be and i can actually do additional pullups, on account of i'm lighter now.

now, here's where the secret comes in, kiddies. don't let it get around.

DIETING SECRET :

It's better to lose weight from a sinus infection than from a bowel infection. Oh, sure, you can lose more weight with a bowel infection, and you can even do it in a shorter amount of time. But having done both, lemme be the one to say: it's a lot more fun to have a sinus infection.

Who needs to breathe, anyhow?

and that brings me to another interesting tidbit about my bowel health, which may actually just display for all my staggering misunderstanding of How Stuff Works Especially In The Bowels.

I was offered antibiotics (a five day course, of course) to deliver the K-O to the sinus (technically: "lung") infection and though i don't like antibiotics because they tend to interfere with the balance of my intestinal flora, i took this as an opportunity to recolonize the tract with some happy yogurt bacteria.

yes, this is really how i think.

the fun thing is, it appears to have worked. i ate actively-cultured yogurt like a mofo while taking the the antibiotic. some speculated that this might interfere with the effectiveness of the antibiotic upon the lung-baddies, but i speculated that the lung-baddies were already losing to my immune system, and that anyhow the antibiotic would do its thing on all bacteria in my body: lung, gut, and lactobacillus, non-descriminatorily, and that this was the very reason anyhow that i didn't like antibiotics, on account of the effects they have on my gutsies.

so, while the azithromycin (funny story about azythromycin. i had thought that all antibiotics had names ending in -cillin, on account of they were derived from moldy bread. then, the day before i went to see doctor feelgood, I watched one of the early episodes of LOST : season 1 (best show ever) wherein doc superman told someone (hurley?) to go gather all prescription drugs, especially those ending in -cillin and -mycin, since those were antibiotics. the very next day i was prescribed a -mycin.) did its thing and flushed the flushables from my various cavities, i bombarded some of those very same cavities (by natural routes, thank you very much) with healthy doses of lactobacillus friendlius. and it seems to have worked: i have fewer gut-related problems than before i got my cold.

now, there are any number of explanations for a reduction in gut-related problems (including, incidentally, my cessation of squats/deadlifts, which, i had long suspected, caused me some problems stemming from increased pressurization of the gut during the lift) but i like to think my pro-active colonization of my 'testines had something to do with it.

and now you know more about my intestinal flora than you ever wanted.